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Emotional Health and Well-Being

When Giving Leads to Resentment

In wrestling with a number of feelings surrounding giving and resentment, I share my thoughts here with hope that doing so might be cathartic for me and perhaps others who might stumble upon this post and feel that they are not alone.

My parents immigrated to Canada from Korea in 1971, two years before I was born. Details are fuzzy, but my understanding is that my father decided to explore prospects of a better life outside of the Korean Air Force, and word from his brother who had already emigrated to Canada was that it was a fine place to start anew. Read more

 

To Reconcile or Not to Reconcile

Earlier this year, my wife Margaret and I decided to homeschool our boys. We agonized over this decision for more than a year, weighing our options and thinking about how to best support our sons as they grow and mature into thoughtful, service-minded, self-sufficient, and emotionally intelligent adults. Read more

 

Getting Clear On Our Why

When I was in chiropractic school, I remember hearing a number of students and professors say that the head of the orthopedic department - I'll call him Dr. Jones - was by far the most knowledgeable practitioner at our clinic. Many marveled at his understanding of the biomechanics of human movement and his wealth of experience in physical medicine and rehabilitation.

I strongly considered pursuing one of two or three coveted orthopedic residencies with Dr. Jones upon graduation, but decided instead to move to rural Alaska and run a clinic on my own. Read more

 

The Need To Be Understood

In 1999, I spent almost a full month of my summer at a water fasting clinic in Ohio. There, I experienced a two-week water-only fast, followed by a period of clean eating to rebuild my health.

I was immensely blessed to share a room with a man from Boston named Joseph Somario. From day one, I was drawn to Joe's palpable kindness and willingness to share from his wealth of life experiences. Read more

 

When a Loved One Struggles

At a recent tennis tournament, our 11-year old son was in the midst of a challenging match with a good friend of his. It was the sort of match where one doesn't want to see either child dispirted. So when I saw our son's light go out late in the match when he was thoroughly exhausted and frustrated, it was I who became dispirited, hopefully not outwardly, but definitely within. Read more

 

Is Your Kid Worth $100 Million?

Many thanks to Michael Lazerow for allowing me to re-publish his article here. I trust that it will inspire. - Ben Kim

Would you sell one of your kids for $100 million? Be honest.

Imagine your little Ben didn't burp or fart or throw up when your boss came over. Or think flushing the toilet was "mom's job." But sat quietly with other Benjamins in piles of crisp, neatly organized rows, ready to be enjoyed. Read more

 

What We Remember

In late winter of 2012 when our boys were 6 and 4, we spent a couple of days at an indoor resort that happened to be hosting the Under-14 Provincial Tennis Championship for Ontario. What an eye-opening experience it was to see 13 and 14 year-olds playing at such a high level, displaying many of the skills and competitive spirit that one might see on the pro tour. Read more

 

All That I Need

Originally shared at our Facebook page in early 2016.

Our younger son, now 8, has been denying me bear hugs and kisses since he was about 3 - I guess there is a part of him that feels like he is too grown up for public displays of affection, especially in front of his friends. Read more

 

Thoughts on Parenting

Untitled

In walking along the icy shoreline of Lake Simcoe with our firstborn in late December, I found myself feeling grateful for having lived long enough to know that our boys will remember me no matter what happens from here on out. This was my greatest wish from the time this young fellow arrived into our arms in 2005.

Today, my new greatest wish is that our boys grow up to feel that they can come to me to talk about anything. No matter how grave their concern, how intense their anger, disappointment, or sadness - even if I am a root cause of their suffering - I hope I will have built up enough trust in my emotional bank account with them that they want to share and discuss their feelings, knowing that I will do my best to understand them. Read more

 

Lessons From The Longest Study on Happiness, by Robert Waldinger

Transcript

What keeps us healthy and happy as we go through life? If you were going to invest now in your future best self, where would you put your time and your energy? There was a recent survey of millennials asking them what their most important life goals were, and over 80 percent said that a major life goal for them was to get rich. And another 50 percent of those same young adults said that another major life goal was to become famous. Read more

 

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