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Some of My Core Beliefs Heading Into A New Decade

The best investment that we can make is in our own development.  When we improve ourselves and pursue skills and experiences that bring us fulfillment, we are able to give so much more to those around us.

Sleep is the safest healing agent.  Whenever we are in the midst of a health challenge, one of the best actions we can take to restore wellness is to get more quality sleep.

An ideal diet is one that allows for steady energy and alertness and comfortable bowel movements.

Great rewards come from giving of ourselves and our resources to people and causes that we feel deeply moved to support.

A highly effective way to experience good mental health is to live with a spirit of gratitude.

Another powerful way to support mental health is to be physically active, be it outdoors or in a gym, and preferably, with enough effort that we perspire.
 
It is ideal to be understanding and compassionate, but when it’s clear that someone isn’t treating us with the same level of care and respect that we strive to give them, we should strongly consider setting an appropriate boundary or exiting the relationship altogether without malice - send them light and send them off.
  
We must not let people who consistently take advantage of us or others be a regular part of our lives.  Toxicity is real and can be highly damaging.

People who are comfortable with themselves and who strive to be authentic and kind exude a special kind of beauty, one that doesn't fade with age.

Every moment is a chance to shift our momentum for the better - it all begins with what we choose to think and the actions that we take.

 
 

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Take some silent time to review and write down any false beliefs you have carried with you to date. Beliefs you have been instilled with at a young age even, that are standing in the way of you becoming a better person. Replace these false beliefs with a positive true belief designed to make you a better person. Consider some breath work. Anthony Jansen

I love all your thoughts sharing your core beliefs as we head into 2020. I believe that the reason I am so drawn to your online community, and always read your newsletters with such enthusiasm, is that we are on the “same wavelength” in terms of our “core beliefs”. It is wonderful to share these positive thoughts and to hope for a better world in the coming decade. Basically, it all boils down to this: Be Kind, Be Generous . Be a Light in the world. Happy New Year, Ben - to you and yours and our big, extended “family”!

Limiting one's choices in life by being disciplined can seem life-restricting on one hand, but in actuality, discipline allows you to get much more out of life than a lack of discipline.

Dear Dr. Kim,

Thank you so much for the encouragement to set boundaries and to distance ourselves from toxic people. I've been struggling with this for a number of years because it's pretty hard when it's a relative. I could feel my blood pressure rise whenever I interacted with them and I knew it wasn't healthy for me. So, beginning this new year, I finally put your advice into action. I told this person that I will be available under strict, explicit boundaries regarding certain family matters. Other than that, there will be no other contact. I'm already feeling the freedom. Thank you!

I have a good friend who had to distance herself from her mother and I thought you'd like how she describes this difficult process: "It doesn't always feel 'good' to escort people out of our inner circle, but truly some don't deserve to be there."

Here's one of mine:
Notice the difference between things that must be carefully utilized and others that are always helpful. For instance, good advice can be helpful or not depending on how it is delivered, when it is delivered, the context, etc while being kind is never off-base, never untimely or problematic. Another example is listening well, which is always helpful no matter what, when we can do it; while speaking eloquently and honestly can be good or bad depending on many things. I think of these two categories as the Yin and Yang of experience. The active Yang interventions must be used judiciously, carefully, with awareness of circumstances etc while the receptive Yin qualitative actions (like kindness, compassion, reflection, willingness, and so on) are always helpful.