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Emotional Health and Well-Being

The Nuances of Saying Sorry

Posted by Dr. Ben Kim on Sep 30, 2019
Emotional Health and Well-Being

Hey Dr. Ben,

Your vlog made me wonder if you've covered the importance of apologizing when you've done something wrong and how to apologize?  If not, I'd love to know your thoughts on this topic.  My fiance and I don't argue very often but when we do, the issue of who owes who an apology is usually a point we have tension over. Read more about The Nuances of Saying Sorry

 

How to Forgive Someone Who Isn't Sorry

Posted by Dr. Ben Kim on Sep 27, 2019
Emotional Health and Well-Being

From Our Mailbag:

Hi Dr. Ben,

I'm 59 years old and am hoping that you can help me with an issue that has been a heavy burden almost all my life. Read more about How to Forgive Someone Who Isn't Sorry

 

Sometimes You Just Have To Say Good-Bye

Posted by Dr. Ben Kim on Sep 25, 2019
Emotional Health and Well-Being

When I was in graduate school, I was lucky to be grouped with a fellow intern who I'll call Jason. Not lucky as in blessed to have a friend who I enjoyed spending time with; lucky as in fortunate to learn what I should stay away from.

I'm not going to attempt to be generous in my recollection of Jason. He was a prototypical user, someone whose idea of being a good friend was gracing you with his good looks over lunch in exchange for you picking up the tab. Read more about Sometimes You Just Have To Say Good-Bye

 

Appearances Matter

Posted by Dr. Ben Kim on Sep 16, 2019
Emotional Health and Well-Being

Originally posted in July of 2014 after the passing of my friend, Dr. John. Updated on August 28, 2018.

When I moved to the suburbs of Chicago shortly after my 20th birthday to begin graduate school, as much as I needed to learn about human physiology and clinical sciences, I was in even greater need of general life guidance. Having been raised by ultra conservative immigrant parents, I had more than a few things to learn about how to understand and interact with people.

I had the great fortune of having as a classmate a fellow named John who was 47 years old and excited to begin a second career. He had done well as a real estate appraiser and property flipper on the east coast, and though he never boasted of his wealth, I knew that John had earned enough to be retired, and was pursuing a career as a health care provider because he had restored his own health with alternative therapies and wanted to share his passion for natural healing with others. Read more about Appearances Matter

 

The Dark Side of Junior Tennis

Posted by Dr. Ben Kim on Sep 10, 2019
Emotional Health and Well-Being

On Saturday September 7th, 2019, the headlines across Canada and the global tennis world captured the incredible accomplishment of Bianca Andreescu, who at 19 years of age, became the first Canadian to win a Grand Slam singles title.  

Those who aren't familiar with what it takes to journey through the junior tennis world to have a chance of standing where Bianca Andreescu is today likely cannot imagine the dark side of such a trek.  

Here's a headline that you won't see from any media outlet: Read more about The Dark Side of Junior Tennis

 

Thoughts on Responsible Alcohol Consumption

Posted by Dr. Ben Kim on Aug 20, 2019
Emotional Health and Well-Being

Approximately 11 million people in the United States and Canada use some form of sleep aid on a regular basis, with alcohol and antihistamines being two popular choices.

Contrary to popular belief, having a nightcap - 5 ounces of wine, 1-2 ounces of a distilled spirit like tequila, vodka, or whiskey, or 8-12 ounces of beer - does not improve sleep quality. In fact, having a nightcap actually takes away from the amount of restful sleep we experience. Read more about Thoughts on Responsible Alcohol Consumption

 

Powerful Things to Say to Your Kids

Posted by Dr. Ben Kim on Aug 09, 2019
Emotional Health and Well-Being

Originally posted in November of 2012

I've long believed that the words we choose in everyday conversation and correspondence play a significant role in shaping our relationships.

For example, from the time that our boys began asking questions to which some parents might answer "because I said so," Margaret and I have tried to preface our answers with "because from my experience, that would lead to..." Read more about Powerful Things to Say to Your Kids

 

What Does A Truly Good Friend Look Like?

Posted by Dr. Ben Kim on Aug 08, 2019
Emotional Health and Well-Being

Originally posted in July of 2018

I've always loved the Korean word for friendship - it's pronounced "oo jung." There was a time in my 20s when oojung was actually the bulk of my e-mail address, back when gmail didn't exist and most of us were at yahoo or hotmail.

More than ever, I find myself considering what constitutes a healthy friendship, for my own well-being, and also to do what I can to help our boys understand what a truly good friend looks like. Read more about What Does A Truly Good Friend Look Like?

 

The Pursuit of Wealth and Prestige

Posted by Dr. Ben Kim on Jul 24, 2019
Emotional Health and Well-Being

Today, it's become somewhat normal to continually pursue things that we think will help us feel better.

More money, splashy vacations, a trophy spouse, trophy kids - you name it, the vast majority of us humans chase after these things that the monkey brain tells us will bring security, recognition, and happiness that supposedly comes with.

Ironically, the more we chase after things that we feel will make us happier, if we truthfully look deep within, we know that we aren't any happier or fulfilled. Read more about The Pursuit of Wealth and Prestige

 

When Our Loved Ones Suffer

Posted by Dr. Ben Kim on Jun 10, 2019
Emotional Health and Well-Being

When a loved one experiences something hurtful and is suffering, I think the instinct for most of us is to identify silver linings and do what we can to fix things.

As a parent to 13 and 11-year old boys, I've come to feel that while there is value in trying to be helpful when they are feeling down, what I'd most like to do beyond offering empathy and a comforting presence is to have them feel the belief that I have in them to eventually find a way to a better place, to transcend their suffering through their own thoughts and efforts. Read more about When Our Loved Ones Suffer

 

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