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Emotional Health and Well-Being

Lessons From The Longest Study on Happiness, by Robert Waldinger

Transcript

What keeps us healthy and happy as we go through life? If you were going to invest now in your future best self, where would you put your time and your energy? There was a recent survey of millennials asking them what their most important life goals were, and over 80 percent said that a major life goal for them was to get rich. And another 50 percent of those same young adults said that another major life goal was to become famous. Read more

 

The Healing Impact of Gratitude

One of the most important realizations that I made early on in my personal health journey and as a health care provider is that all of us have the priceless ability to generate powerful waves of healing energy on demand.  

How, you might be wondering?

The answer lies in filling ourselves with an enormous spirit of gratitude.   Read more

 

Selfish Choices

The challenge with those who regularly make selfish choices is that typically, they are unaware of the pain and hurt that they create for others. For the purpose of streamlining these thoughts, let's call such people egoists: those who are preoccupied with their own interests.

My life experiences have led me to believe that the vast majority of egoists behave the way they do because they carry significant unresolved pain within, often some combination of not having received sufficient love and being put down by those they most needed to be nurtured by as youngsters. Read more

 

Unseen

Growing up as a visible minority of immigrant parents in a predominately Caucasian town in Canada, I gradually learned that many people in that town conflated my parents' English language ability with their intelligence. It was almost as though for many, the subconscious mind automatically assigned a positive correlation between language proficiency and intelligence. The thinking must have been something like: Well, they run a variety store and I have to dumb down my words when speaking to them, so they can't be very smart. Read more

 

What Does A Truly Good Friend Look Like?

I've always loved the Korean word for friendship - it's pronounced "oo jung." There was a time in my 20s when oojung was actually the bulk of my e-mail address, back when gmail didn't exist and most of us were at yahoo or hotmail.

More than ever, I find myself considering what constitutes a healthy friendship, for my own well-being, and also to do what I can to help our boys understand what a truly good friend looks like. Read more

 

How to Forgive Someone Who Isn't Sorry

Originally posted in September 2019

From Our Mailbag:

Hi Dr. Ben,

I'm 59 years old and am hoping that you can help me with an issue that has been a heavy burden almost all my life. Read more

 

Dr. Shefali Tsabary on Conscious Parenting

Unbeknownst to her, Dr. Shefali is one of my most treasured mentors. Whenever I experience conflict with our boys, I find myself re-reading passages in The Conscious Parent and The Awakened Family to try to figure out where I went wrong as a person and parent. Read more

 

How We Measure Success

A while back, I stumbled upon the following priceless commercial that aired in Malaysia over the Chinese New Year holiday several years back. Most of it is painfully familiar to Asians of my generation and I'm guessing to many from other cultures as well. The closing scene never fails to leave me with a heavy lump in my chest.

I hope you have a chance to enjoy this lovely look at some of the different types of success that we can experience in this world: Read more

 

Thoughts From a Former Tiger Mom

Dear Dr. Kim,

This is out of character for me but I feel compelled to write to you so I'm letting down my guard and following my heart.

I have much to be thankful for. I had responsible parents who took care of all my essential needs growing up. Being immigrants from China, they didn't believe in brand names and luxuries. They were all about buying only bare bones necessities and saving the rest for the future, including my university education. What my parents lacked in warmth they compensated for in making sure I was never going to be hungry or homeless. Read more

 

The Dark Side of Junior Tennis

On Saturday September 7th, 2019, the headlines across Canada and the global tennis world captured the incredible accomplishment of Bianca Andreescu, who at 19 years of age, became the first Canadian to win a Grand Slam singles title.  

Those who aren't familiar with what it takes to journey through the junior tennis world to have a chance of standing where Bianca Andreescu is today likely cannot imagine the dark side of such a trek.  

Here's a headline that you won't see from any media outlet: Read more

 

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